FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
