trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Farmville is her only friend.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize