just come out here and I will go home with you...
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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