He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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