Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
