Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize