Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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