party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
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I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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