dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
