We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
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