I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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