Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  are you still at the devil's house?

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  (248): are you still at the devil's house? http://tfl.nu/bw8z
  Replies (4) Good night (1419) Bad night (1913)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.

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  (847): I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public. http://tfl.nu/kcoy
  Replies (16) Good night (2489) Bad night (551)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.

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  (519): Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation. http://tfl.nu/lz4o
  Replies (17) Good night (4112) Bad night (898)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.

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  (716): I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together. http://tfl.nu/l7kg
  Replies (34) Good night (3177) Bad night (9924)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.

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  (519): Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn. http://tfl.nu/jg1z
  Replies (7) Good night (1134) Bad night (2651)
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  (916): View more from California

  nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds

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  (916): nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds http://tfl.nu/1rag
  Replies (5) Good night (1238) Bad night (2506)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.

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  (920): when life gives you lemons, puke and rally. http://tfl.nu/b13b
  Replies (19) Good night (2840) Bad night (1048)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.

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  (313): In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact. http://tfl.nu/ir67
  Replies (12) Good night (2118) Bad night (953)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.

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  (416): I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me. http://tfl.nu/zzjd
  Replies (9) Good night (589) Bad night (1249)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him

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  (518): Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him http://tfl.nu/dlpo
  Replies (9) Good night (1317) Bad night (473)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.

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  (859): I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it. http://tfl.nu/qtph
  Replies (8) Good night (686) Bad night (436)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.

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  (479): He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish. http://tfl.nu/o2hu
  Replies (0) Good night (469) Bad night (258)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...

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  (360): You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again... http://tfl.nu/ebe2
  Replies (3) Good night (586) Bad night (346)
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  (848): View more from New Jersey

  Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.

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  (848): Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem. http://tfl.nu/e34z
  Replies (2) Good night (392) Bad night (864)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out

  (914): View more from New York

  He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off

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  (914): Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out (914): He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off http://tfl.nu/ygvv
  Replies (0) Good night (423) Bad night (168)

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