Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day

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(813): View more from Florida

I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.

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(530): View more from California

Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(954): View more from Florida

FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me

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(307): View more from Wyoming

These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.

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(773): View more from Illinois

I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.

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(563): View more from Iowa

Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant

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