he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
