i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
