Jerry, you need to find god
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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