I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
