I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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