This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Randomize
