that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
