u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
