I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
