these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
You're earring is so big in my mouth
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
