end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
