the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
