yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
