Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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