too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
