I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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