Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
