Have you finally orgasmed yet?
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Randomize