Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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