I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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