Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
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