dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Randomize
