no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
