So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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