i permit you to call me
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
