ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
