her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
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There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
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They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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