You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
