Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
