I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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