You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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