Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  someone threw a dead crab at me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): someone threw a dead crab at me http://tfl.nu/za5q
  Replies (4) Good night (839) Bad night (1188)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking http://tfl.nu/678a
  Replies (14) Good night (728) Bad night (2174)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar http://tfl.nu/y62m
  Replies (10) Good night (4808) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (320): I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town http://tfl.nu/1n02
  Replies (32) Good night (4108) Bad night (1092)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry. http://tfl.nu/nber
  Replies (2) Good night (4272) Bad night (716)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I don't know where my bra went.

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I don't know where my bra went. (1-303): Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy. http://tfl.nu/03yq
  Replies (22) Good night (7947) Bad night (1056)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend. http://tfl.nu/u6sb
  Replies (7) Good night (2802) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (50): View more from

  I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (50): I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious. http://tfl.nu/irod
  Replies (5) Good night (2991) Bad night (779)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me. http://tfl.nu/grf1
  Replies (7) Good night (921) Bad night (1392)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog http://tfl.nu/oyfd
  Replies (6) Good night (1632) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine. http://tfl.nu/2kaz
  Replies (5) Good night (1383) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (369): View more from California

  Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (369): Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night? http://tfl.nu/oh80
  Replies (7) Good night (712) Bad night (1067)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty. http://tfl.nu/yaxr
  Replies (2) Good night (438) Bad night (280)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen? http://tfl.nu/8ha5
  Replies (21) Good night (863) Bad night (355)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there" http://tfl.nu/jagl
  Replies (1) Good night (905) Bad night (251)

Randomize