now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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