He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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