I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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