For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Randomize
