Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
