ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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